Freeland PA

From:

The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

monachopsis
n.   the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place, as maladapted to your surroundings as a seal on a beach—lumbering, clumsy, easily distracted, huddled in the company of other misfits.



So,
we decided to go on a hike and a picnic lunch in a park on Sunday.
I said "We will need supplies." So it was off to Dollar World to pick up a few odds -n - ends.
As I walked in, the thought struck me,  When did it ever occur to me that shopping at the Dollar World would seem "Normal". But there I was.
Mary said "Don't forget bug spray."
Rodger that, on my list.
So I am walking the isles of Dollar World, and I see they have toilet plungers for a dollar. Right next to the king-sized spunow.

Oh, wait, the shelf stocker put the display in upside down. Its Mounds.

Anyhow, I find mosquito repellant, and I ask the cashier, "If I spray this on a mosquito,  will he become like a mosquito pariah? Will all the other mosquitoes treat him like a mosquito IT guy? An outcast? Shunned by all the other blood-sucking bugs?"




"Look, it's a dollar. Do you want it or not?"

Well off we went to Rickets Glenn state park with our bug spray. 13,050 acres big. With Hunting. And dog-hunting training areas.  And the "short" trail.
I have not been on a hike for almost a year.

The "short" trail was 7.5 miles.

Very nice park.  Very steep trails.  After a while I realized we were no longer on the green (easy) trail, but on the black (most difficult) trail.
I thought it best to keep that information to myself for the time being.

 (The Gang)

 At one point, we met a small group (Small in numbers, they were actually quite large) that wanted to know where the parking lot was. I said if they go back the way they came, the parking lot was just over 1/2 mile away, if they keep going in the direction they were going, it would be about seven miles. And it was 6:30.

I thought: You don't have any food, water, jackets or flashlights, you are wearing flip-flops. It is starting to rain. It will be pitch dark in a little over an hour. This trail is one of the toughest I have been on in years. Good luck.

(NOTE: I forgot to mention that by all outward appearances,  these "hikers"
seemed to lack the skills these two possess.) 

One of them said, "Is the trail steep? I think we will keep going for a while longer then turn back."
Again I thought, These "kids" are 23, 20, 17 and 15.  They are breathing hard and sweating. I am 53, and just able to keep up with them.
I will look for the headline: FOUR HIKERS GO MISSING IN RICKETS GLENN in the Luzerne County Standard-Speaker on Monday.

The Standard-Speaker; Best news always:

http://standardspeaker.com/news/no-1-place-you-don-t-want-to-be-when-the-zombie-outbreak-hits-nepa-1.1845741

Ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you to step away from the Funyuns.  I am charging you with misdemeanor 12-86.5, mopery with intent to gawk, leaving the scene of a cheeseburger, and intentionally getting lost in the park after dark.