St. Patrick

 It's that time of year again, the "Ole Reenforcin O' the Stereotypes" 

So, Before you even attempt to find a Leprechaun you better start by finding a good lawyer first!  There are many law firms out there that already have pre-written contracts to protect you in case you should happen to acquire a Leprechaun.

Now the law firms don’t go out of their way to advertise this service out of fear of retaliation by the Wish Giving Community. But if you go in, state your intended purpose and don’t resemble a Genie or Leprechaun, most of these firms will be more than happy to work with you in exchange for a few gold pieces.

You got your contract in hand, maybe even a lawyer in your party. What next?  Don’t make the mistake of being drunk! A lot of people celebrate the day by drinking green beer but don’t make that mistake. If you do, a Leprechaun could literally talk you into anything. Even sex! If that happens, you will NEVER live that down. Believe me on this.

Instead, let bottles of beer set out so that Leprechauns drink it! They’re easier to catch when they let their guard down. There’s even a story about a Leprechaun being caught from behind while taking a lengthy beer pee. If you try this method, you may want to wear some sort of rain gear.

Showering that morning with Irish Spring soap and having Lucky Charms for breakfast will help you maintain a low profile while you’re out on your search!

The wearing of the green may be helpful in your search. Your lawyer should also dress in a similar manner. Don’t let them wear a business suit, you don’t want your personal lawyer to scare the Leprechauns away. They are not stupid! Also, the green outfits can provide good camouflage while searching within a deep forest.